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Friday, October 18, 2013
Bottom Rock
One week blocked leave ending..
Woke up at 0945 and kind of pull until something on my elbow...
sting pain whenever i bend it, but as long as it can move, it will heal itself..
Posting is out today,
Posted to Air Force School
Vocation: Air Force Tech(Trainee)
YES, everyone has that question in mind, Why there?
Even my dad gave me the puzzled look when he got back from work..
How come tech when no engineering background and my diploma wasn't specializing on that
Everyone expecting OCS, Naval Officer as I have been expressing interest in..
but sometimes, things goes the other way..
I don't have a engineering background, I'm combat fit and physically fit, I'm PES A...
I also have this question in my head but where do I look for an answer?
If talking about BMT performance, I think I did well enough.
If talking about peers, I definitely didn't have any grudges between section mates.
So where did it go wrong? I'm also looking for the answer and don't ask me, I really don't know.
Disappointment after disappointment...
Whenever someone ask, the disappointment just snowballed...
Not saying that this vocation isn't good, I remember during my times in BMT,
Encik once said, all vocation are important, they need each other to make things work the way they are.( not trying to comfort myself)
Since there is no way of reverting the posting, I gradually taking it in, need some time for it to sink in.
Now all I know that I'm being posted there, though I'm affected by this very much cause I didn't really see this was coming,
but during my days in BMT,
I learned this term called Professionalism.
Wherever I'm being posted to, I go there and do what I need to do.
To the other section-mates,
Congrats to those to went SCS or OCS. Well Done!
Though we not going to the same unit/ vocation, remember to stay in contact uhs!(:
Don't forget about me lehhh!
The guy who was quiet on Day One who turn out to be a noisy and annoying ass !
HAHAHAHA..
This week has really been bad for me, really bad.....
Felt like I hit rock bottom in life once again, no words can express what I'm going through,
Love, Passion... Everything...
Is another roller coaster ride where this time I'm going downhill again.......
I really don't know what to do,
the whole week I have been hanging and trying..
What you said this morning is harsh, but I know is a wake up call, you been emphasizing since day one when we got together or even before we got together.
They said is a phase that one has to go through to see the rainbow and sunlight,
I hope it's really a phase.
But before the phase continue, it's lingering....
Really hope you think about it, I have shown you this few days already.. I'm trying so hard, I believe you can see it for yourself.
To me, this few days, you have been just running away and avoiding.. to me.
The final decision is left to you. Take whatever you want in consideration, make the optimal decision.
I hope let's not drag this on, it hanging and struggling for me...
Let's come to a conclusion.
Jon