Monday, October 28, 2013
The lowest point in my life
Life hits rock bottom once again...
I don't know why...
Just like a parachuter leaping out from the sky, free falling without its parachute being deployed...
And slam! hit into the ground, making a deep mark.
Desolated,
Lost...
Frustrated...
When a man cries, means he is letting out his feelings.
When a sad man doesn't cry, nobody knows what inside of him that exploding.
There are still so many things going in my mind,
Sitting by the reservoir, many things going through my head.
'Has signs been giving in the progress of the relationship?'
'Why didn't I question it?'
Whatever that's going through the mind, there is no point now.
We had made a good memories, this is for sure,
how we started, chasing, teasing each other,
The first phone call, I will never forget that... the surprise element was huge.
The first date,
The first driving date,
The first kiss and the first hug..
All these were wonderful memories, and will definitely leave a mark inside me.
2 month plus, say short also not short, say long also not long..
But to me,
In a relationship is not how long it is, but rather, what did we go through together as a couple.
They say time will heal everything, true, is the best medicine... but if it ended for a reason then time will heal, but is it did not end with a valid reason, I'm pretty sure it going to take a very very long time...
Memory are still fresh in the head, heart is still intact with your name, somehow it felt like you're still belonging to me, still with me. That's how sudden it is..
It's not about pointing the blame to whose fault, but is just how could it ended like this ?
Say go then go, say end then end. ):
Not coping well for sure, definitely for sure.
So many things in my head, brain squeezing, heart aching....
人间没希望、没快乐、没意思
This morning, Mum start asking me about you,
when exams and stuffs,
and then ask me to call you to join for dinner today, heading to have the complimentary meals from Pizza Hut during the BMT.
Why ask me when everything ended? How am I going to answer and face it?
Met papa and mama for dinner together, first question was: 'Girlfriend didn't come?'
I seriously have no guts to face it now, I want to hide. Avoiding all these questions...
As for you,
Exams is coming, your hard work will pay off after spending so much time on studying and putting in effort.
Everyone has their limit, don't always think negatively and saying you not putting enough effort or you're stupid. Just do your best!
And also remember to take care of your health, be safe and careful in whatever you're doing.
You will never know whose worrying for you always.
looking at this video, it never fail to make me feel the sting in my heart.
Somehow I don't know why, I'm not angry or pissed, just question mark and question mark in my head. There isn't any hatred or bad feelings but just.... sigh..
miss you